“What we’ve got here is (a) failure to communicate” The Captain
 
“You can tell alot about a fellow’s character by his way of eating jelly beans”  Ronald Reagan
 
“Fettucini Alfredo is like Mac & Cheese for adults”  Mitch Hedberg
 
“A waffle is just a pancake with a syrup trap”  Mitch Hedberg
 
“I imagine if you could understand Morse Code a tap dancer would drive you crazy”  Mitch Hedberg
 
Mitch died WAY TOO young he had some seriously good one liners
 
“The broccoli says ‘I look like a tree’.  The mushroom says ‘I look like an umbrella.’  The walnut says ‘I look like a brain.’ The banana says ‘umm can we just change the subject?'”  Unknown
 
“‘Yes, Oh, Ooh, AH, YES, YES, OH GOD, YES, YES, YES, AH, Ohh..’  I’ll have what she’s having”  When Harry met Sally